


The King, not my King

by aceofhearts88



Series: Howling at the Stars [6]
Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: King's Landing, Starfall, a surprise appearance at the end
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-22
Updated: 2017-09-22
Packaged: 2019-01-04 04:43:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,025
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12161766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aceofhearts88/pseuds/aceofhearts88
Summary: Andric is forced to ride for King's Landing to represent Prince Doran's position in dealings between the Crown and Dorne. Benjen is sworn to remain at his side despite the bad feeling and the not yet calmed panic upon having refused a position on the Kingsguard.He hates the capital, he hates court, he hates the people sitting in it. He hates the man sitting in the Iron Throne, he hates the men standing next to it. It's gonna be a tough trip.





	The King, not my King

Benjen stopped outside of Andric's solar, hand already raised to knock when his soon-to-be goodbrother's voice exploded behind the closed door, he froze mid movement.

"And you have the audacity to demand this of me?" Andric was yelling, something loud thumped inside the room, Benjen's mind whirled with thoughts, weighing up leaving and knocking, Andric had called for him after all, "Have you lost your mind entirely now? Or has your brother? This is an insult to my family!"

"Andric, please be reasonable."

Benjen felt his eyes widen when the voice of Prince Oberyn spoke up, calmer and more controlled in contrast to Andric's harsh tones. Benjen hadn't even known the Red Viper had come to Starfall, he usually didn't come in secret, was more prone to make it as dramatic and well known as possible.

"Reasonable?" Andric's snarled question drew him out of his thoughts again, "You want me to be reasonable? You? After all that you have done, after all that you have talked about in the last three years, it is me who has to be reasonable now. Have they sent me a mummer in place of Oberyn Martell? I appreciate this sign of respect from Doran, it is certainly long coming but I refuse to take part in his plans and schemes, and even more so I refuse to sent even a single soul of my household to that treacherous rat's nest."

Benjen frowned, rumor had it the crown had realized the Dornish silence – had only taken them two years, by the gods – and was seeing plots and threats where in truth the country was still very much covered in heavy grief and sadness. 

Princess Elia, Princess Rhaenys and Prince Aegon.

Prince Lewyn and all the men he had led North to fight for the Targaryens.

Ashara and Arthur, as not dead as they were, Baratheons and Lannisters had forced them to live far away from their home.

"I believe that is not what the letter states." Prince Oberyn could be heard again and then a knock, Benjen stared at his hand as if it didn't belong to him anymore in that moment, cursing himself. The room was silent for a moment, but then Andric called him in, Benjen opened the door only a bit, looking inside. Prince Oberyn was sitting on one of the chairs in front of Andric's desk while Andric himself was standing in front of the large bookcase, Benjen had no doubt he had been pacing again.

"I apologize, Andric, Carral has mentioned to me that you wish to see me urgently...I can come back at a later point." Despite the many dealings and confrontation he had had in the last two and a half years with the Red Viper, he had always felt scrutinized, kept under close watch as if Prince Oberyn was looking for something. Benjen knew, even though he shouldn't really, that there had been loud disagreements at the beginning of his time in Dorne between the Daynes and the Martell brothers who hadn't wanted to see the younger brother of the Usurper's dog being squired in one of Dorne's greatest houses.

Only Andric's reminder that it had been their father who had forced Andric's hand in sending his younger brother off to King's Landing to join the Kingsguard had shut Prince Doran's objections off. Back then, both Princes had still thought Arthur to have been slain by Ned and his men, by now they knew the truth.

But not about Jon. Or Torrhen for that matter.

"There is no need to delay, Benjen, come in." Andric waved him inside and Benjen slowly stepped into the solar, closing the door behind himself and remaining only a step away from it, eyes flickering between Andric's frown and the familiar blank face of Prince Oberyn. Benjen greeted the Prince with the customs every Dornishman used, a slight bow, a greeting of his name with title and house.

As always it made the older man surprised, like every single time Benjen greeted him as such despite not being of Dorne and thus not called upon to do so. Benjen had never thought about not doing it though, he was betrothed to a Dornish Lady, he had squired for a Dornish Knight and the Sword of the Morning had knighted him. He hadn't been in the North for two and a half years now, he may never be Dornish or want to be fully Dornish, but he could show respect to the people who had taken him in, given him a home and a family.

After Benjen had thought both lost.

"The young Lord Stark." Prince Oberyn inclined his head briefly back at him, "Though it is Ser Benjen now. I must apologize for not having been able to make it for the occasion, I fear I was otherwise occupied." The Prince told him with a grin, Benjen smiled back but felt nothing, from the corner of his eyes he caught sight of Andric glaring at Prince Oberyn.

Who had been sniffing after Arthur and Ashara in Pentos when Benjen had knelt under the stars with Arthur holding a sword to his shoulder.

Andric broke the following moment of silence when he moved to his desk and grabbed a piece of parchment before begging Benjen over with two fingers. Benjen moved and took what turned out to be a letter from Andric's hand, turning to read it he could feel ice dropping into his stomach immediately.

'King Robert Baratheon, First of his Name, Rightful Ruler of the Seven Kingdoms, extends the offer of letting Ser Benjen Stark of Winterfell join the Kingsguard when he comes off age.'

Panic seized his veins and mind and could only not fully take root because Andric's hand settled between his shoulderblades. Benjen looked up, caught eyes that were almost all purple in the dim light of the solar in this late evening.

"No" was all Andric had to say and Benjen bit down on his lips to keep the million words from falling out, fear and terror gnawing at his heart. "No knight from these walls is ever going to join a Kingsguard again."

"Andric."

"No." Andric whirled around to Prince Oberyn again, his hand leaving Benjen's back, "It's not even an option. I swore to Lord Stark that I would keep his brother safe, that I would offer him a home and not just shelter. I swore to my own brother that despite the boy's skill he would never have to follow in Arthur's path."

"Arthur took the oath with honor."

"For Rhaegar. Not for Aerys, not for the mad man but the son. I don't have to tell you what bond Rhaegar and Arthur had. The Usurper is already half as mad as Aerys was, his wife is a treacherous bitch."

Benjen smirked faintly when he saw the flicker of amusement in Prince Oberyn's face, he had quickly learned that verbal insults to the crown were a daily occurence really in Dorne. They had never knelt, verbal treason was not something anyone was bothering with here.

"So you did not lose your fire after all, Doran might have almost had me believe you were tamed."  
"Tamed?" Andric laughed and then huffed, "If my own wife can't tame me, no one can, my friend."  
"Aye, I know." Prince Oberyn agreed and leaned back in his chair, Benjen had always been fascinated with how a man could command his surroundings so easily with just his charima, "Your temper was always a cause for amusement. It must be a pain for the other Dornish houses, two sets of brothers on top of Houses Martell and Dayne. Brothers like day and night when it comes to their temper."

"Your father always said House Dayne was in for a jolly time when it came clear that Arthur chose the sword and I would be Lord after all." Andric mused, one hand in his hair, Benjen looked between both men, he had heard the stories before. The hotheaded first son of Lord Beric Dayne and his quiet stony little brother, and a House in worry that Andric's temper might not be the best for a Lordship, he had proven them all wrong.  
"I think my father actually wept the day Arthur got sworn in and held Dawn." Oberyn added with a grin, Benjen couldn't really understand why, everyone who knew Arthur even slightly would immediately know that being a Lord of some castle was the very last thing Arthur would have ever wanted for himself.

"First time Rhaegar got introduced to me, he was close to weeping, too." Andric deadpanned and Prince Oberyn broke out into loud boisterous laughter, it broke through the tension in the room and Benjen found himself smiling as well. It was hard to imagine, this man, this Silver Prince who had seemed larger than life, a walking mystery, tall and lean and so utterly handsome that even Lyanna had cried when he had sung that night in Harrenhall.

To think that Prince Rhaegar had cowered before Andric.

"Ah, yes, he was certainly not well aquainted with the prospect of protective older brothers or protective brothers in general. Did you ever meet him, Benjen?" Prince Oberyn directed at him and Benjen sent a quick look to Andric whose eyes were set on Oberyn.  
"No, my Prince, I...I did not...really...not really..." Benjen stuttered himself through it all with a heart pounding against his chest while those dark eyes watched him with their intense stare again.

Prince Oberyn liked to make people nervous, see them sweat and squirm, Andric had warned him about it often, Arthur had told him to not let it get under his skin but Benjen had not yet found a method to avoid it.

"Oberyn..." Andric came to his help as he moved to sit behind his desk again, his eyes sending a warning to the Prince who turned his smirk into a smile, turning from viper with razorsharp teeth back to a man with a kind heart.  
"Pardon, Benjen, my manners." Prince Oberyn drawled and Benjen let himself relax again a little, he had no reason to fear the older man, he just had the tendency to make him increasingly more uncomfortable with every visit. Andric said it meant Oberyn liked him.

It was also Andric who whisked the topic back on line, grumbling under his breath for a moment before he sighed deeply, eyes set on the damn letters from the crown and the one from his own sworn Prince.

"I'll go to King's Landing, I'll work out the deals with the King...or supposedly his Hand." Andric began, not impressed or happy at all, "Benjen, I fear I have to ask you to accompany me, but I swear to you you will return with me."

\--

Allyria took the news of a once more postponed wedding just as well as Benjen had expected, which was to say not at all. He occupied himself with entertaining little Edric while the youngest Dayne sibling was loudly arguing with the oldest. Eyrin tried to breathe through it, had long since stopped trying to calm them down.

Carral hadn't even joined them for supper tonight, fully well knowing that his youngest cousin would be all up in arms over another delay of her wedding. Benjen was angry about it, too, disappointed really covered it better, but the panic over Robert's offer and the unease over having to go to the capital left him too frozen to engage in any discussion.

Let alone to try and calm Allyria down.

The only one truly amused by the scenario was Prince Oberyn who twirled his wine cup in his hand and watched Allyria and Andric pacing around the private dinner chamber. The loud arguing lasted about another half an hour before oldest brother and youngest sister both dropped into their seats again and then fell into an exhausted silence for a few minutes.

"If this wedding gets postponed one more time..." Allyria began then in a quiet dangerous hiss that had Andric freeze with his cup close to his lips, "I'm gonna kidnap Ben. We will ride North and marry under the first weirwood tree I can find." Benjen's wine went down the wrong pipe as he swallowed and he wildly started coughing over Allyria's deadly serious face.

Andric was frozen and Eyrin had lowered her face into her hands, on her lap Edric seemed confused over the reaction of his parents, babbling quietly and pulling on his mother's sleeve.

"Don't think kidnapping Starks to get married is a good idea." Oberyn deadpanned in his warm drawl and Benjen couldn't help it, whereas Allyria and Andric both turned to glare at the Prince, he started laughing loudly, making his coughing only so much worse. Oberyn reached out to clap a hand to his back. "Though there is a weirwood tree in the Citadel, Allyria."

"Oberyn!" Eyrin gasped and Edric was giggling loudly, clapping his hands, at least someone was well entertained. Andric groaned and dropped his face into one hand.  
"I'm not marrying in the Reach." Allyria scrunched up her nose and held out a napkin for Benjen to take, he could breathe again and stiffled his laughter with the napkin. "Or the Stormlands for that matter. Is there a weirwood tree somewhere in the Crownlands that isn't the capital?"

"Allyria!"

"I fear, you'll have to go as far as the Riverlands."

"Oberyn!"

"That would certainly hold it's irony. Getting kidnapped in Dorne to get married in the Riverlands."

"Benjen!"

"No one is going to get kidnapped, and no one will kidnap anyone." Andric cut through the loud laughter, taking a long sip of his wine. "I find it wonderful that we can apparently joke about the matter now with a Stark and a Martell at the table no less. But still, the people outside of Dorne believe Benjen is a hostage, given to Dorne to soothe our anger against the rest of the realm...I know how stupid it is, Allyria." Andric stopped whatever she had wanted to say, Benjen knew the reasons on why no one had ever approached the rumors, neither Ned nor Andric, playing along protected Arthur, Ashara and the boys. 

"And..." Andric continued, "If any problems arise, I'll have the Kingsguard on my doorstep on direct orders of the King and I'll gladly do without it." He clarified and Benjen and Allyria both nodded, joking set aside now, "If King Robert so much as hears rumors about anyone wanting to kidnap a Stark, he will send out armies to Dorne, and that will not do us any favors."

"I understand it. I'm not happy with it, but I understand. Just make sure you all come home again." Allyria added quietly after Andric's little speech, Benjen grabbed her hand under the table and squeezed. "Neither Starks or Daynes get happy if they leave for King's Landing."  
"We will come home, sister, I promise you." Andric said, ducking down to catch his sister's eyes across the table, "And there will be a wedding when we return."

"I promise as well, Allyria." Prince Oberyn surprisingly spoke up as well, "I have sworn to not set foot into the capital again without due reason, but I swear to you that if anything happens, we will not sit by and let Dorne's children suffer again in the Red Keep. Andric and I will work out a messaging system and if that breaks off I'll take men and ride to King's Landing myself." Allyria looked grateful, and Benjen saw how Andric nodded at Oberyn.

"And I'll write to Arthur, tell him that he'll get visitors after the wedding is done. You two deserve some time away from here." Andric smiled at both of them then, and Allyria and Benjen grinned brightly at the offer. 

He would see his nephews.

He would get to meet his nephews.

Suddenly surviving King's Landing and court sounded much easier.

\--

"I really don't want you to go." Allyria whispered from where she was sitting on top of his bed, arms wrapped around her knees. Benjen hesitated briefly in tying up his doublet, he finished it up before turning to look at Allyria. "My brother went to King's Landing and he was more and more broken with every visit, until he turned entirely crushed, and now he is living halfway around the world. My sister went to King's Landing and lost everything that was dear to her, her best friend, the man she loved, the life she loved and the freedom she so desired."

"I will come back, Ally. Nothing will change." He promised her, kneeling down on the edge of the bed, reaching out to frame her face with his hands, "A few weeks, and when I come back, we will get married." He told her and gently kissed her, Allyria chased after him when he pulled back again. "I need to do this, Ally. You heard Andric. If he turns up without me in his guard, people will ask questions and attention is not good. I am one of his sworn swords, I have to go."

"Please come back to me." Allyria begged of him, getting to her feet and holding onto his hands, "Please promise you'll come back to me."  
"I promise." Benjen said without a doubt in his heart, leaning down to kiss the top of her heart, "I will return. If any kind of trouble only so much as seems to be there, a raven will fly for Oberyn. It's gonna be okay." She took a deep breath and Benjen could see the tears of fear in her eyes that Allyria would not let fall, "Come on, help me with the armor. Be sure that I am protected, it will help."

When it was time, they walked down into the courtyard together and Allyria hugged Andric, Carral and him fiercely before walking to stand next to Eyrin. Benjen took a deep breath once he was sitting on his horse but looked down when a hand patted his thigh, he found Oberyn looking up at him with a grim smile. 

"Keep true to yourself, Benjen." Oberyn reminded him one last time and then pulled out the dagger Benjen kept on his belt, replacing it with one whose blade shone brightly in the sun. Benjen snapped his gaze up to dark eyes, immediately recognizing it for what it was, "Most unlikely that I will have use of it inside of my homeland's borders. I gave my other one to Andric, but I hope you will not come to use it and that you'll be able to return it to me without them having seen new blood."

"Thank you, Oberyn."

He rode out of Starfall's walls with one last look thrown over his shoulder, smiling when Allyria waved.

\--

Benjen felt his heart squeeze tight and tighter as the Red Keep grew bigger and bigger in front of them, his fingers tightened on the reigns but he kept his posture straight. Andric had kept their revenue small but with those who had travelled to King's Landing, he had gone all out, and the official Dayne Knight armor alone gave Benjen the confidence he needed to get through this visit.

It was the first time he got to properly wear it after being fitted for it a few moons ago, usually this kind of armor was reserved for war times and upon official visits Dornish knights and guards chose to prefer ceremonial armor. 

Until now.

He glanced down, the dark grey riding boots had been a gift from Arthur for the Knighting ceremony, they worked well the light grey tunics if Allyria was to be believed and Benjen had seen her eyes when he had said goodbye to her. His cloak as those of the other men Andric had taken with them was silver, a trick in the fabric and not real and it had the fallen star of House Dayne in white on the back. His armor was polished, shone almost brighter than the cloak, breastplate and armguards as well as guards for his shoulders, below it a greyed leather doublet and a lavender colored tunic.

Allyria had stolen it from him a few days before they had needed to leave and Benjen had threatened to throw her favourite dress into the Torrentine before she had relented and showed him what she had been doing. Now he only needed to slightly pull down the riding glove on his right hand to see the small grey direwolf Allyria had stitched into the fabric on the inside of the sleeve.

Benjen looked up from it when Andric let his horse fall back to ride next to him as the walls of the Red Keep built itself up in front of them. Tall, imposing. Full of rats. Small and tall. Fourlegged and twolegged.

"Stay close to me or at least don't go anywhere without at least one guard." Andric repeated his words again, he didn't really phrase it as orders, he would not, not with someone who was basically family but Benjen heard the underlying message nevertheless, had heard it from the first time on. This was a dangerous place for Dornishmen and -women, and those loyal to them. 

The Daynes had been closer to the Targaryens than the Martells had even, a daughter of their line had married a prince who had later become king, even if she hadn't been queen. The Royal family had carried Dayne blood in their veins before they had been slaughtered. Aegon V, Jaehaerys, Shaera, Aerys, Rhaella, Rhaegar and his children. Two generations of incest had even kept the Dayne blood thicker than it usually would be after such a time.

They had been kin and not just friends and King and Queen and Prince.

Prince Rhaegar had been a friend of Andric's and Arthur's best friend. And now they were riding into the court of the man who had slain him.

While far away in a white house in Volantis, Rhaegar's only living child played with his pet lizard, not knowing that even a wink of his existence would sent the assassins scurrying towards Essos. Like they already did for Prince Rhaegar's younger siblings who had been able to flee.

Benjen despised this place. And the people in it.

\--

They rode into the courtyard and Benjen swallowed heavily when he caught sight of the man in the white cloak awaiting them, once upon a time in what felt like a different lifetime he had admired this man. One of Aerys' Seven, one of the best knights in all the Seven Kingdoms.

Now he was a turncloak. 

And the Kingsguard was made up out of men who had less than a questionable reputation at best.

Only two and a half years ago, Arthur was part of this, his mind provided him as he glanced over to Andric whose face was closed off and whose eyes spoke of a million things he wanted to say but couldn't. This man fought beside Arthur once, this man swore the same oaths as Arthur did, and then he switched his loyalty to the new king, mere hours after his prince had fallen.

Arthur would have rather chosen death.

But then again, his little still boyish dreams whispered at the back of his heart, if Arthur had been in Selmy's place, it wouldn't be damn Robert sitting the throne now, but Prince Rhaegar.

"Keep close." Andric whispered to him as they both dismounted and handed their horses over to stableboys who had rushed out of the shadows, servants hurrying back to take their bags. Benjen set a hand onto the hilt of his sword and kept at Andric's shadow, like a sworn sword would, as Ser Barristan Selmy approached, revealing the man who had stood in the shadow of the pillar behind him.

The Hand of the King.

Lord Jon Arryn.

Ned's foster-father and Benjen's father's close friend.

Benjen swallowed again, feeling more uncomfortable than ever before when he saw those blue eyes flickering over to him briefly, a smile being sent in his direction that he couldn't return. Hidden behind Andric's back, Carral stepped up to his side and uncurled Benjen's finger from their desperate hold on the sword's hilt.

It was going to be okay.

A few days, Andric had said, just enough to settle Dorne's business with the crown and then they would be on their way again.

"Lord Dayne." Jon Arryn greeted Andric first as customs would have it, "It is a joy to greet you at court, I believe it has been a while." And right into the awkward wound, Benjen thought when he saw how Jon Arryn shifted while Selmy winced and Andric's shoulders tensed. "Quarters have been prepared for you and your men. His Grace will receive you once you have had a chance to freshen up. I will leave you in the hands of Ser Barristan, he will lead you to your rooms."

It might have been meant as a gesture of good will.

Let someone guide Andric whom he had known before but if the stormcloud growing to new size in purple-blue eyes was any indication than literally everyone else except maybe the Kingslayer himself would have been a better choice. Andric glared at Selmy, Selmy himself didn't meet his eyes.

Benjen felt like throwing up.

Again.

Lord Arryn turned to Benjen then, a smile on his lips but Benjen once more didn't give one back, he didn't know him, not really. His father had been friends with him, had sent Ned off to be fostered with him, and it had been Jon Arryn who had threaded the idea of a betrothal between Houses Stark and Baratheon because Ned had spoken so highly of Lyanna.

A sister he had never truly known.

Not like Benjen had.

"Benjen, it is a joy to see you again, it has been a long time." Jon Arryn said to him and Benjen felt something hot run down the back of his head, down his spine. "You have grown a lot, the Dornish sun and air must do you good."  
"Lord Stark couldn't have made a better choice for me." He recited the words he had trained to speak in front of a mirror and Allyria so many times in the last days before their departure, "Starfall has truly become a second home."

Jon Arryn blinked at him but said nothing.

\--

At least some measure of sense was left at court when the greeting by the King would not happen in the throne room but in a smaller banquet hall. 

And still, as they – Andric, Carral and Benjen – walked along the corridor, led by a silent Ser Barristan, Benjen couldn't help but think of what had happened here. His father had died here, burned by the Mad King, whispers that had reached him despite Andric's best trys to not let them spoke that one could still see the black charred spot on the ground. Brandon had died here, choked to death while trying to reach their burning father. 

Princess Elia, raped and slaughtered. Princess Rhaenys, stabbed and stabbed and stabbed. Prince Aegon, his tiny head bashed against a wall.

Benjen doubted sleep would come easy.

He entered the hall behind Andric and Carral and only half listened to both of them greeting the King with stiff words and even stiffer shoulders.

"Benjen!" Robert's voice boomed through the room then and he took long strides over to him, "It's been so long, boy." And Benjen couldn't help himself, couldn't help following his gut, his gut that was screaming for him to back off, so he did. He took a step back, and then two, and Robert's hand didn't land on his shoulder but slipped through air and hung at his side.

"Your Grace." Benjen greeted him, inclining his head in the sign of respect Andric had faked as well, they had talked about it long. Everyone knew that Benjen Stark had been sent away to Dorne, but no one had to know that he hadn't fully shifted his loyalties that in the depth of his heart he was still Northern, he would always be a Stark.

Just not for this king.

'He's a King, but not my King.'

The words he had spoken to Oberyn the night before leaving for King's Landing returned to his mind, 'Good' Oberyn had said, 'Hold onto it in that damn rat's nest. No mad dragon around, but hungry lions, and I am no longer sure who is more dangerous. Take care, Benjen, stay true to yourself.' Just as much as the look Oberyn had given him before he had given Benjen the small dagger with the golden hilt and the blade made out of Valyrian steel the next morning.

Never would Benjen have thought that taking advice from Oberyn Martell would be helpful in such delicate matters as dealings with the Royal Family, but now it didn't feel that weird anymore. 'Let an act be a mask, let them see who you want them to see, even if it's a fool, but hold onto yourself, don't ever lose sight of who you are. Protect it, shield it.'

The Dornish didn't kneel, so Benjen didn't either.

Considering that Robert didn't lose his stupid fat grin, Benjen supposed he didn't care or hadn't even noticed it.

Jon Arryn on the other hand was watching him closely. And Benjen wondered what he was seeing. 

The clumsy little pup of Winterfell.

A hostage manipulated by the hated Dornish.

Or the truth.

The Knight who didn't want to be there, who didn't want to face the King and everything he stood for. The Knight was North and Dorne at the same time, who had chosen Starfall and Andric without ever losing sight of who he really was. 

\--

When Andric left to hash out the trading agreements and other political nightmares a day later, Carral had left with him to be the shadow and the watchful eye. Benjen was by far too much on edge to be guarding anyone at the moment, every inch of those blasted walls were making his skin crawl, the thought of the throne hall made him break out into a cold sweat. He followed the other Dayne knights down to the training yard, more out of necessity, Andric had made it clear he was to either stay in his chamber or be with a guard at all times.

In his chambers, the walls were closing in on him.

And Benjen didn't want to keep anyone from sparring to waste time in this hellhole, even if it meant sitting off to the side and sharpening a blade while Kingsguard trained in white cloaks that were tainted with wrong honor. Selmy was with the King and his council, so that was one set of eyes less to stare at him.

Which unfortunately left Benjen under the stare of the green eyes of the one remaining Kingsguard of 'old'. The Kingslayer. It was weird to see him, walking about the place as if there was honor left in him. There were so many questions Benjen wanted to ask him, so many things he would have loved to get an answer for.

The one burning one so hard on the tip of his tongue that he kept his teeth gritted together.

How could have you betrayed Arthur's belief in you so? 

Here he was, sitting in the presence of the only other person Arthur had ever knighted, the only other person on whose shoulders Dawn had rested while he had spoken an oath.

How could there be something the two of them had in common?

'Do you regret it? Knighting him?' His voice asked in his memory and he could see Arthur's eyes looking out over the sea from the top of the Palestone Sword again, glazed over with something heavy, 'Sometimes' Arthur had answered and Benjen had turned quiet.

"And you, Stark!" The Kingslayer's voice ripped him out of his dark thoughts, Benjen glanced over to his annoying visage, "Would you refuse a Kingsguard a spar as well?" Benjen raised his hand against the outcry of protest from the Dayne men and only then looked up properly, Jaime Lannister was watching him with those smug green eyes. Geran and Tomas were both moving to present their displeasure at the Kingslayer's words but Benjen wouldn't have it. He went to his feet and grabbed his sword, silencing the older knights in lavender tunics with a quick glare.

He was younger then some of them by a landslide but his standing among the ranks had always been higher, and his actions had done the rest. Geran and Thomas swallowed their words and turned silent, but neither dropped the hand from where they were resting on the sword hilts on their hips, Luca was twirling the spear against the ground.

"If it's a spar you want, you will get one." Benjen forced himself to keep the words neutral, as much as he wanted to spit at the Kingsguard's feet. He unsheathed his sword and only briefly looked at the blade Jaime Lannister held, was it the one that had killed Jon's grandfather? Was it the one that one soiled every ounce of honor and bravery Arthur had ever seen in Jamie Lannister?

He didn't kid himself, didn't think he had a chance to take Lannister off his feet, no matter how much he wanted to. Lannister had learned from the others of Aerys' famous Seven, but Benjen thought he was to be capable of at least holding his own.

And he did.

Even managed to surprise the blond man with a few tricks while they sparred against each other, steel hitting steel. Benjen counted it as a full success when he had Lannister stumble back a few steps with a good move, already way too happy over the fact that he hadn't kissed the sand yet. 

When they broke apart he was breathing heavily but even let himself be convinced to a handshake, some of that nervous energy had left him, it had felt good. Lannister froze when they stepped apart, looking at something over Benjen's shoulder and fully prepared to once more tell the man to calm down, Benjen turned around, sword still loosely twisted in his right hand.

A stupid habit he had picked up from Carral and Arthur as well.

He blinked at the hard edged glare on Andric's face that was turned on Jaime Lannister, violet eyes were furious, but all explanations got stuck in Benjen's throat when he found the blue eyed look of confusion and something else in the white cloaked Barristan Selmy next to Andric. Because his eyes were staring at Benjen. And only Benjen.

\--

That night Benjen returned to his chambers after a quick round of cards with Carral down with the other knights but the corridor where Andric, Carral and him had their rooms wasn't as empty as he had upon first sight expected. From around the corner voices could be heard and he frowned when it sounded suspiciously like Andric. 

Pushing himself away from his door, he slipped on quiet feet to the corner and then glanced around it, heart stuttering when he saw Andric's form standing with his arms crossed over his chest in front of Barristan Selmy.

"Come on, Andric." Selmy was speaking up again in the next second, "The first time I saw your brother fight, he was eight. He spent the majority of the time that really shaped his fighting style in one training's yard with me. I saw how Arthur trained Rhaegar, the little tricks, the annoying little habits that developed. You want to look me in the eyes and insist that it your cousin who by just pure coincidence taught the young Stark the same tricks?"

Benjen cursed himself for having used one, it had just felt too good to see an opening in the freaking Kingslayer and use it to his advantage.

Andric remained silent for a short moment and then made a step closer to Selmy still, arms falling down at his side, hands clenching into fists. "I will look you in the eyes, Selmy, and tell you whatever I want to. I do not owe a fuck of truth to you, you are not even worth a lie anymore. What makes you think I would even entertain the notion of telling you anything? You want my secrets written out in ink so your King will have an easier time ordering you to slay the remaining members of my family?" 

Selmy flinched but Andric had only started, Benjen frowned when he saw the temper in the man rise who had basically been his foster-father in all but name. His hand wandered to his sword quite on its own, even if the gesture was stupid, Selmy would cut him down before Benjen was even close enough to Andric to grab his arm.

"Do I get to die first? Or do I get to bury another sister?" Selmy winced again, Andric lunged for the open wound like a predator, "Will he send his monster to kill my wife and my son like he did with Rhaegar's?" Something like raw hurt crossed over Selmy's face, Benjen swallowed heavily, "Another group of men will ride for Dorne and cut down my cousin and my soon to be goodbrother? Tell me, Barristan, just so I can have the right picture, this place isn't giving me enough nightmares yet."

"Arthur was my friend..."

"So was Rhaegar. And here we are, Barristan the Bold wearing a white cloak still, serving the man who killed Rhaegar." Andric snarled dangerously low and Benjen found himself walking around the corner quite on his own, Selmy's eyes were on him immediately before they flickered back to rest on Andric's furious face. "We will live our lives, Barristan. Quietly. You do not have to expect any trouble coming from Dorne, tell that to your precious King. We lost enough, all we want to do is mourn those still who were taken from us. Some of them for the mere blood in their veins. You made your choice, I made mine, Barristan, we will have to live the rest of our lives with them, so I hope you chose wisely."

And then Andric whirled around on the spot and stalked off towards Benjen, grabbing his arm and pulling him over towards Andric's very own given chamber, the door was slammed shut.

"How much does he suspect?" Benjen asked quietly, sinking down onto a chair while Andric poured himself a cup of wine and emptied it immediately.  
"He suspects about as much as anyone does who has ever seen Ned Stark with a sword in his hand. Your brother is good, but we should have never said he defeated Arthur in single combat, he is not that good. I should have known that people like Selmy and that freaking Lannister boy wouldn't buy it." Andric ranted, dragging a hand through his hair.

"Are we in trouble? Are they...in trouble?"

"No. Lannister suspects that something foul was at play, that they cheated to take down Arthur, I hope your brother won't travel down to court anytime soon. Jaime Lannister's hero worship might unleash in some animosity towards Arthur's supposed killer." Andric explained and sunk into the chair across from Benjen, "God, I want to leave this rotten place. Rhaegar was right, it's a miracle if one keeps his temper in check for more than a day in this atmosphere."

"What about Selmy? Could he cause trouble for us?" Benjen wanted to know, throwing a concerned look at the door, but Andric snorted.  
"No, he won't. I don't know what goes on in that man's mind but I know that he respected Arthur and that he loved Ashara. If he suspects that they are alive, he will not do anything to endanger them." Andric said and then leaned back, head dropping and his eyes falling shut, he looked terribly exhausted, "Just please don't spar with anyone anymore as long as we are here. And please don't go anywhere alone, I don't want any of these vultures and lions corner you."

"I promise."

\--

"This is so creepy." Benjen mumbled under his breath as he followed Carral deeper down into the tunnels under the Red Keep, staring at dragons skulls left and right, getting bigger and bigger the deeper they went. "Why did I agree to follow you again?" He whispered in a hiss towards the man who was supposed to keep him out of trouble and not drag him into it.

"You wanted to see the skulls." Carral drawled, perfectly at ease, "And you wanted to get away from Selmy's stare." Both was in fact true, and Benjen still regretted to have followed Carral down in this place. Arthur's voice was nagging at the back of his mind to turn the fuck around and get back to his chambers, Ned's voice was equally urging him to stop this nonsense.

"Well, I saw the skulls now. Selmy is in a small council session. I'm fine, can we go back now?" He grumbled but Carral simply grabbed his arm and pulled him along.  
"We can go back once you've seen the big one." His once mentor and Starfall's Master-at-arms said with conviction and Benjen gave himself over to his fate.

Carral led him over to Balerion, he had been down here the day before when Benjen had suffered through tea with the stupid Queen along with Andric. The skull was impressive, really impressive, bigger than Benjen had thought it to be to be honest and he found himself staring at it while he moved around a little.

"Insane, isn't it?" Carral spoke up, "That something this big was walking around our lands two hundred years ago." Benjen could only nod in agreement. And then something hissed in the dark and Benjen whirled around with a drawn sword, crashing with his back hard against the dragon skull.

It was a cat.

A simply midnight black cat that trotted out of a dark corner of Vhagar's skull across the tunnel corridor from them and Benjen wasn't the only one who cursed loudly. "Bloody hell." Carral snarled, sheathing his own sword again with rough movements, Benjen was still too busy willing his heart to drop down into his chest again to even bother with doing so himself.

This place was going to age him up years if they didn't leave soon. And he didn't just mean the bloody tunnel, he meant the entire fucking capital. He had drawn his sword on a fucking cat, angrily but also throughroughly exhausted Benjen pushed his sword back into the scabbard at his hip and pushed himself away from Barlerion's skull to stalk back to where they had come from.

He needed a cup of wine. 

And something sweet, something really awfully sweet.

'It is adorable really, reminds me of how Rhaenys was with her cat. God, that damned black beast, couldn't have been named more appropriate.'

It hit him like a punch to the gut and even while his mind was still offering up the words Arthur had spoken during a family dinner the day before the Knighting ceremony, Benjen was already whirling around. Carral's quick reflexes prevented him from crashing right into him, but Benjen cut him off before Carral could have even opened his mouth, shoving him to the side to get the damn cat back into his sight.

Golden eyes watched him, sharp, curious, smart.

A black furry body was still set to pounce.

Wary, alert. 

Benjen made a step, then another, only to stop when the cat hissed and growled, a sound that echoed from the old walls and made it sound louder than it really was. On a whim, he went down on one knee and held out a hand. 

"Balerion?"

\--

Robert insisted on seeing them off and Benjen was so relieved upon finally being able to leave that his defenses were low enough so he didn't notice that he finally found himself alone with the King apart from Andric and his people. Selmy was the only one close by but he at least had stopped staring at Benjen as if he was some kind of puzzle to solve.

Robert slung an arm around his shoulders and Benjen drooped a little under his weight, already seated on his horse Andric froze and violet eyes narrowed in their direction.

"You ever fall in trouble with the lot of them, you write to me, Ben." Robert crowned in his ear almost, as silent as he was capable of in his booming voice and Benjen felt himself bite down on his tongue almost to keep his eye roll back. Gods be damned their king was a moron. "I don't trust the lot of them at all, especially those Daynes." He sneered the name like the insult he meant it as, "Were way too close to those blasted dragons, kin even."

Benjen swallowed down the urge to remind Robert that his own house had once been established to power as a bastard line of House Targaryen, or so the rumors went anyway. They were kin, too, Robert just chose to forget that Rhaegar Targaryen had been his second cousin.

"They'll have you swept away into another tower before the raven even reaches Ned." Robert went on and Benjen didn't feel himself low enough to send a very dark look towards Selmy, hoping for intervention but the older man continued to stare straight ahead, "Ned should have never given you to him, you mark my words, Ben, he'll regret it still. You be careful with those desert snakes."

"Of course, Your Grace." Benjen somehow, by whatever miracle the gods offered to him, managed to say the words without any form of judgement or distaste behind them, even somehow forcing a smile onto his face, "I thank you, Your Grace." Robert grinned and sent him off towards his horse with a slap to his back.

Benjen, Andric and Carrel all took a deep relieving breath when they reached the city border and rode out into the Kingswood. And then they were laughing.

\--

"I can't believe it." Oberyn said for the fifth time since Benjen had handed his gift over to him in Andric's solar, Allyria refusing to leave his sight for even a second. Balerion was purring wildly, pressing his face against Oberyn's cheek and arching his back into the hand Oberyn kept on running over it. Oberyn himself was still stunned, but his eyes were misty and over by the desk, Andric was smiling over to them briefly before Edric demanded his attention back.

The ride back to Dorne had been entertaining for Benjen, the responsibility over a cat certainly having him forget the ugliness of King's Landing. Balerion had made it easy, hadn't looked like he wanted to leave any of them when Benjen had let him out of the small cage whenever they had stopped for camp in the night. He had only ever briefly disappeared to hunt something before curling up with Andric or Benjen in their tent.

And now, seeing Oberyn reunited with the cat he had only a few years ago gifted to his niece, it felt good, felt like this trip had almost been worth it.

"Okay." Allyria broke through the happy lack of conversation, Benjen glanced over to her, "Gift handled, trip discussed. Can we talk about the wedding now? I need to go over the guest list with you and you need to be measured for new robes and Eyrin says I cannot chose all the food on my own." She was dragging out of the room and Benjen threw a helpless look over to Andric and Oberyn but both of them pretended to be utterly too busy with the child or cat in their arms. "And oh my god, Ben, you cannot believe what they did with..."

It was great to be back home.

**Author's Note:**

> I want to note that the opinions expressed about Robert, Arryn, Barristan Selmy and Jaime Lannister are not necessarily the opinions I have towards them in the canon setting of the story. This is an AU, please keep that in mind before coming for my neck because I treated someone unfairly. Benjen and Andric, the whole Dayne family really, have reasons for their view point and their thoughts about the whole thing, and that Oberyn doesn't trust anyone in King's Landing is very much canon anyway.


End file.
